Everybody Goes To Hell

Candi Beth, watcha′ doin'?
Candi Beth, what are you doin′?
I'm sorry Mom, I'm a pagan, sold my soul to Carl Sagan
And I know that′s your worst nightmare coming true
Remember when you said you love god more than you love me
No wonder I have these abandonment issues
I might be a witch because I like burning candles
And I have a crystal collection
But you believe you′re possessed by a man
Who offers you cosmic protection
Don't pray for me, I don′t need to be forgiven
Everybody goes to hell in somebody else's religion
We all want to have the answers, and we all want to go to heaven
But everybody goes to hell in somebody else′s religion
Religion
I'm sorry Dad I′m a heathen, I'm happy with my demons
I discovered they're a part of who I am
And I know you′ll be embarrassed when you see the truth about
My life and sexuality on Instagram
But your version of god sounds like my abusive ex
The one I was too scared to leave
Do I really deserve to be tortured forever
Because I no longer believe


Don′t pray for me, I don't need to be forgiven
Everybody goes to hell in somebody else′s religion
We all want to have the answers, and we all want to go to heaven
But everybody goes to hell in somebody else's religion
Religion
So ring the bells, light the effigy
Burn the witch if that′s what you think of me
I didn't lose my faith, I threw it away
Ring the bells, light the effigy
Burn the witch if that′s what you think of me
I didn't lose my faith, I threw it away, I threw it away
Don′t pray for me, I don't need to be forgiven
Everybody goes to hell in somebody else′s religion
We all want to have the answers, and we all want to go to heaven
But everybody goes to hell in somebody else's religion
Religion
I just want to take a moment to apologize
To anyone I might have hurt
And to anyone I tried to convert
Either successfully, or unsuccessfully
Uh, to my best friend Justine
I′m really sorry about that time I called you
In the middle of the night
And I begged you to accept Jesus as your
Savior so you wouldn't go to hell
That was really shitty
And um, to my Mom and Dad
I love you